It’s all a bit different…

September has been a crazy month for me and it’s all revolving around 2 things.

  1. Getting a new job with Blacknight
  2. Moving away from home for the first time.

For the past 23 years, I have been living with my parents (and more recently my grandfather). Some or most teenagers would want to move out as soon as they hit 18, not me though, I stayed with my parents because I unfortunately didn’t have the funds nor the Leaving Cert points to go to College. Even with grants, I couldn’t get very far.

So for about 18 months after I finished 2 years in Monaghan Institute (Which was just a FETAC Level 5/6 courses college only) I went on the dole. From June 2011 to January 2013, I was on the dole. Me thinking back to that time now, it was possibly the worst part of my life.

I was a disgusting slob with no intention of working and no intention of actually doing anything with my life.

My father, being who he is, put me in my place and I got up off my lazy ass and done something about it. (Thank you Dad)

In January 2013, I started a JobBridge in a national school, being a IT manager of sorts. That lasted 6 months and then I was back on the dole again until May of 2014.

I still had 12 months of JobBridge remaining, so I thought I would give something else a try. I applied for a Digital/Retail Assistant internship at PetShopOnline and that is where I got my first job. It took me until I was 22 to get my first job.

Those 2 years between 20 and 22 had to be the worst now I think about it further.

So fast-forward to August of 2015 and there is a job advertised for Customer Service / Tech Support at Blacknight. My thoughts were “Let’s see how far I get with this” and I applied for the job.

Sure enough, here I am now, 4 weeks later living in Carlow and about to start my 3rd week of work with them.

But it hasn’t all been plain sailing when moving to Carlow. I had to leave a lot behind and sacrifice a few things.

  1. My parents.

Maybe it’s just home sickness talking, but I miss my parents…Yes, I can talk to them on Skype, but it’s just not the same as being there in person.

  1. My friends

Even though most of my friends have left Monaghan already to go to college in other counties in the country, I obviously still had friends in Monaghan and I do miss talking to them. 🙁

And what’s worse is, I know no one in Carlow. (Besides the people that I work with of course) And it does feel lonely in the evenings when I come home from work as I have no one physically to talk to. At least in Monaghan, I could talk to my parents…Now I just talk to myself.

A friend of mine made a small post on Facebook about Anxiety and Depression which linked to this post on Campus.ie, and it hit me hard. It’s OK to be having this job and living in your own flat, but when you miss your family and friends, no knowing anyone in a new place, it can lead to depression.

And I will admit, I have been a bit depressed since moving to Carlow. There has been a lot of change in my life this year and Carlow overall has been a big change for me. I take my mind off things by cleaning, doing shopping or working on my website.

On my way to work last Thursday, I thought about how lucky I was to be in this position. And the one person who would have been proud of me, is my grandfather. My grandfather was a great role model and I look up to him.

Without him, I wouldn’t be here. Thank you granddad. 🙂

I just hope that the next few months can be kind to me.